Viagra Jokes
Some of these Viagra jokes are pretty funny, we hope you enjoy!
Q: Why do nursing homes give Viagra to their male patients?
------------------------------------ The man answered, "Just a few, maybe four, but cut each one into four pieces." The pharmacist said, "That won't do you any good." The elderly gentleman said, "That's all right. I'm over 80 - I don't need them for sex anymore. I just want it to stick out far enough so I don't pee on my shoes." ----------------------------------- The pharmacist answers firmly, "Yes, sir. We certainly do." The man then says, "Do you think I could get it over the counter?" The pharmacist looks at him for a moment and then says, "Perhaps if you took 5 or 6 pills at once, you might." ----------------------------------- A man and his wife went to the chemist to pick up his prescription for Viagra. Seeing the $10 per pill price, the man was astonished - but his wife had a different opinion - "Oh, $40 a year ain't too bad". ----------------------------------- Joe: "Well, I went to the doctor this morning and told him I had to get some of those Viagra pills. The doctor told me they wouldn't help my love life at all." Bartender: "Why not? I thought that they would do the trick for any guy." Joe: "The doctor told me it wouldn't help me at all to put a good flag pole on such a worn out old building!" ---------------------------------- A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex. So, that night at dinner, she does. About a week later she's back at the doctor's office. She says, "Doc, the pill worked great! I put it in the potatoes like you suggested. It wasn't five minutes and he jumps up, rakes all the food and dishes off the table, grabs me, rips all my clothes off and ravishes me right then and there on the table." The doctor says, "I'm sorry, we didn't realize the pill was that strong. The foundation will be glad to pay for any damages." "Naah..." she says, "that's okay. We wouldn't go back to that restaurant anyway." ---------------------------------- This old man in his eighty's got up and was putting on his coat. His wife said, "Where are you going?" He said, "I'm going to the doctor." "No," he said. "I'm going to get me some of those new Viagra pills." So his wife got up out of her rocker and was putting on her sweater and he said, "Where are you going?" She replied, "I'm going to the doctor too." He asked why. She says, "If you're going to start using that rusty old thing again, I'm going to get a tetanus shot!" ----------------------------------- Q: What do you get when you mix Viagra and Prozac?
------------------------------------ A man goes to a doctor and, twitching his fingers and stuttering, finally manages to say, "Doctor, I have a sexual performance problem. Can you help me?" "Oh, that's not a problem for us men anymore!" announces the proud physician. "They just came out with this new wonder drug, Viagra, that does the trick! You take some pills, and your problems are history." So the doctor gives the man a prescription and sends him on his merry way. A couple of months later, the doctor runs into his patient on the street. "Doctor, Doctor!" exclaims the man excitedly. "I've got to thank you! This drug is a miracle! It's wonderful!" "Well, I'm glad to hear that," says the pleased physician. "What does your wife think about it?" "Wife?" asks the man. "I haven't been home yet."
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